Other Types of Concerned Parts

Concerned parts usually feel judgmental or angry toward the target part. However, they can have other attitudes as well. In this section, we discuss how to work with these concerned parts.

Sometimes positive feelings can interfere with your being in Self. If you admire the target part to such an extent that you lose sight of how it is causing you problems, you are not in Self. For example, suppose you have a part that is really angry at your boss and is creating a lot of drama at work. You start to explore it, and when you check to see how you feel toward it, you realize that you love how it stands up to your boss. You have lost sight of the fact that it could cost you your job, and this means you aren’t in Self. Ask this admiring part to step back.

Sometimes a concerned part is frightened of the target part. If it can’t step aside, as Lisa’s did, there are a couple of ways to make this easier. You could ask the scared part to move into a safe, comfortable room while you get to know the target part. This may reassure it enough for it to leave. You can also visualize the intimidating target part in a room where you are seeing it through a window, which provides containment. It lessens the fear that the target part might spontaneously attack.